OUR NATIONAL TREASURE?

SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS REGARDING
“OUR NATIONAL TREASURE?”

They're everywhere: circus's, malls, parades, rodeos, conventions, parties. The clown
has become an integral part of our culture.

What could be funnier than seeing two clowns using the prop called the butt paddle?
After much yelling back and forth, which gains the crowds attention, the paddler swings and
strikes the other in the rear. A bang almost as loud as an explosion generally propels the paddlee
through the air onto his face. Now that's funny.

I would wager that many a successful clown
career has been launched with the bang of the butt paddle.

Equally funny is the offering of a flower to, ideally, a trusting child. As the clown walks
away with the flower, the youngster has only the stem in her hand to the screaming delight of the
crowd. The child is left to contemplate the trustworthiness of strangers with white faces and red
rubber noses. Oh, that I may live long enough to witness that, one more time. Another flower
routine. You smell the flower in the clowns lapel and --- Ha! Gotcha. You're dripping wet.

Almost as hilarious is the clown that rides a bicycle with a square wheel. As he bumps
uncertainly along, the crowd leaps to its feet and points and laughs. That is really funny.

Sometimes clowns don't have to do anything to be funny. They can just parade by in their
outrages outfits. Hardly trend setters, you say. Recently I have noticed young people who have
stolen hair style ideas from the clown. Certainly, if there is a God in Heaven, Hell will be
populated with punk rockers with rainbow hair. But I digress.

My favorite clown is the sad clown. Frequaintly he is dressed as a hobo. His make-up
features the turned down mouth and he sulks and tries to sweep a spot light into an ever smaller
and smaller pile. He wanders about with bowed head, tears running from his eyes. Now that is
really a riot. Why is he sad? Maybe his first name is Emmet. That would make me sad.

Some clowns are very talented. They can walk on stilts or do magic tricks, or make
balloon animals. They're not very funny.

Being a clown is sort of a dead end job. You don't work up to trapeze or lion tamer. You
never heard a U.S. president say, "I used to be a clown." Maybe they were and just don't talk
about it. I don't think so, though. Reporters would find out and run their pictures on the editorial page -- in full
costume.

The clown movement in the United States is growing. There are schools for clowns,
clown associations, clowns for Jesus, and clown support groups. An ever increasing cadre
representing our nations talent and skills are being drawn from the manufacturing and service
sector into the clown sector. This will eventually affect our productivity and balance of trade as
well as the GNP. But, think about it. We will be a happier nation.

Story ID:	759
Written by:	Dick Dunlap (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:	Musings, Essays and Such
Location:	Everywhere USA
Year:	2006