You Want What?

An amusing anecdote originally published by John Mario on Associated Content.

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'Hi, Mr Smith. I'm Mr Adams. Please come into my office so we talk about the loan."

The two men walked into the office.

"Have a seat." Mr Adams walked around and sat at his desk.

"What is the problem?" asked Mr Smith.

"We are a little confused about your last business venture." He paused, "Exactly how did your business fail?"

"It all started with protestors outside my office."

"Protestors? What were they protesting? I mean -- You were running an acupuncture business. Right?"

"Yes."

"They didn't like the business you were running?"

"That's correct."

"How did your patients react to these protests."

"Oh. It didn't bother them at all."

"Then how did the protestors put you out of business?"

"They burned it down."

"Where they arrested?"

"No."

"I still don't understand."

"They didn't like the business I was running so they burned it down. I lost all my stuff including my dolls."

"Your dolls? Was your acupuncture business a front for prostitution?"

"Oh no. I would never do that."

"I think I'm beginning to understand. So your patients defied the protestors by entering your office."

"No. The patients never came to the office."

"Now I am thoroughly confused. If you want the loan, you must tell all. Understand?"

"Okay. Here is how it worked. A patient would phone me and complain about pain. I'd ask the patient exactly where the pain was and then I'd ask the patient to email me his photo. When I received his photo, I would assemble a doll that looked exactly like the patient and then I would stick needles in the doll to relieve the pain."

"Get out of my office."

"But what about the loan?"

"Loan? You think I'm nuts? I won't loan you a wooden nickel. Now get out!"

Story ID:	5157
Written by:	John Mario (bio, link, contact, other stories)
Story type:	Musings, Essays and Such
Location:	Bridgeport CT USA
Year:	2009
Person:	John Mario