Reporting from afar

Reporting From Afar Martin Steele

I am only a cub reporter. My paper in New York thought it a good idea to give me some experience in Moscow. They allowed me to take my dog Bushy, a well bred bulldog.
I arrived on a bleak day in a hurry, a late model, and went straight to the office which turned out to be in a barn. There was a lot of mooing about and with dung in cheek I asked “Whose idea is this?”
The editor/ commissar said “None of your business. Now get the vladiviostok on with your work.”
“Who you going to attack?” he said. “Maybe Stalin?”
I thought he said “Are you stalling?” “No I’m not” I said.
“Well don’t gulag behind .”
“What you writing?”
“I’m doing a piece on Putin. He came to the States and stayed at the Plaza. He didn’t like it and made a speech of how unhappy he was. I’m transcribing that now. It’s Putin on the Ritz. That’s where he wanted to be."
“As a matter of interest’ I asked. “How am I being paid?”
“In local currency.”
“… but it’s worthless isn’t it?’
“Who said that?”
“I heard it was originally trouble which didn’t sound so good. They tried zlotys but the zee sounded anti-islamic. Then they took off the t.”
“Who told you that?”
“A quote in the Zvezda journal.”
“Borsht!”
The editor slowly took to me over the six weeks I was on loan to Pravda. He started inviting me out vodka for I was not sure. He asked me if I was interested in roulette.
“Well I’ve played in Atlantic City and Las Vegas. Where is your casino?”
“It is a private sound proof house where we play. We used to have six of us playing but there is only myself left. I am trying to put a team together.”
“Is it American or French roulette?’
“It is called Russian Roulette. You can’t lose because you may only play once.”
“Oh! Tight restrictions?”
“No limited to six participants.”
“When do we play?”
“I’ll let you know.”

The tabloid paper in New York had a short notice in the obituaries last night.
Gerald Kushintok fondly remembered. Lost in the first round of a closed competition.
Last seen in Moscow. If you see his dog Bushy, pat him and ask what the hell has been going on. There is a reward of plenty troubles.

Story ID:	5142
Written by:	Martin Steele (bio, link, contact, other stories)
Story type:	Story
Location:	Delray Beach USA
Year:	2008